“…that we may lead a peaceful & quiet life.” 1 Timothy 2:2
I came across this verse in my quiet time and every fiber in my being was drawn to it.
This is exactly what I crave and yet I’m drawn to busy. I’m drawn to work. To productivity. To serving. To achievement & perfection.
I looked up the definition of “peaceful” in the dictionary and I read,
free from disturbance; tranquil
not involving war or violence
Surely, that’s what I experience daily, right?!?
Am I free from disturbance? Do I feel tranquil?
I guess my answer depends on the day. On the days when I start with Jesus and allow the slowness of the morning to lead the way for my day, then yes, I do feel like my life is a peaceful & quiet one.
On the days when I wake up anxious with my to-do list running through my mind, ruminating thoughts on past “failures” or fears of the future holding me captive, then yes, my life feels chaotic as I pursue productivity and achievement. Stress rules these days.
In those panic-driven days, I allow fear to guide me. This either results in a whole lot of busy-work or I shut down in deflation. Non-stop or off. There is no in-between.
The question I often return to in those times: How can I lead a peaceful & quiet life that truly feels connected to Jesus and honor what I am called to do by Him?
Because I am a nerd, I also looked up the definition of the word quiet.
Verb:
making little or no noise
carried out discreetly, secretly, or with moderation.
Noun:
absence of noise or bustle; silence; calm
As I read this, I realized the chaos is all internal. it starts in my mind. I get easily distracted. I allow so much input. I worry that I’m missing out on something. I stress out. I get busy or I shut down. Either way, I don’t move forward.
My internal busyness is preventing my peaceful & quiet life.
A peaceful and quiet life isn’t necessarily one that is solely made up of yoga and sitting in nature. Because, believe me, chaos can find you there also.
A peaceful and quiet life is one without constantly seeking the “next big thing”. It’s a life where contentment is found in the present, where growth is preferred over achievement. When I focus on the present, I am thriving right where I am.
I want to move forward in my life with intention and being led by Christ.
I want all the inner struggle over what I “should be” doing to be minor in comparison over “knowing” what God would have me do.
Being in communion with Him each day will always trump the tasks I think I, again, “should be” focusing on. Social media posts, emails, podcasts, speaking engagements, and blogs will pale in comparison when I am confident in my calling because my days start with Jesus. My rest is found in Jesus. My peace comes from Jesus.
Leading a stress-less, peaceful, and quiet life starts with an invitation from Jesus being accepted by me.
reflection within myself
As I contemplate the good I have found during this time of a global pandemic and racial unrest, I have found my heart getting very heavy from weariness and emotional pain. But God…
He has been so good to open up my blind spots. He has given me wisdom and insight.
One verse that stood out to me during my time of reflection was Jeremiah 10:29:
“I know, O Lord, that the way of man is not in himself, that it is not in man who walks to direct his steps. Correct me, O Lord, but in justice; not in your anger, lest you bring me to nothing.”
I read that and immediately I feel to depth of my core that I my desire for control, order, and achievement are preventing my own personal peace. Upon struggle, I mentally default to defeat and grasping at control. I have become keenly aware that my fear is amplified in my self-reliance, I try to outperform when I feel inadequate instead of asking God for strength, I tend to seek solutions outside of God. God has used this time to show me how my priorities have become misaligned with “harmless” things that pull my focus from Him. He has shown that I continue to have a death-grip on some things, revealing that I don’t trust Him completely and it renders me ineffective and inflexible in my work and ministry.
That is hard list to write up. But just as God promised to bring the Israelites out of their affliction from Egypt, His words resonate with me right now where I stand.
“Then the Lord said, “I have surely seen the affliction of my people who are in Egypt and have heard their cry because of their taskmasters. I know their sufferings and I have heard their cry because of their taskmasters. I know their sufferings and I have come down to deliver them out of the hand of the Egyptians and to bring them up out that land to a good and broad land.” Exodus 3: 7-8
In that verse I am reminded that I am seen. I am known. I am heard. The peace that I withhold from myself is known to God. And He loves me enough to deliver me from my inner turmoil. I only need to respond and find my rest in Him, not achievement. I am unable to be a light in the world when I am stuck in my “striving” gear.
I can share peace with the world when I am at peace myself.
Minimizing stress within ourselves starts by asking God what is preventing us from experiencing His peace and being willing to sit quietly while He shows us.